The Anti-Avraham

Bava Basra 21

Our Gemara on amud aleph offers ancient wisdom and ideas regarding pedagogy of young school children:

Concerning that same issue, Rav said to Rav Shmuel bar Sheilat, a teacher of children: Do not accept a student before the age of six, as he is too young and it is difficult for him to learn in a steady manner. From this point forward, accept him and stuff him with Torah like an ox. And Rav further said to Rav Shmuel bar Sheilat: When you strike a child for educational purposes, hit him only with the strap of a sandal, which is small and does not cause pain. Rav further advised him: He who reads, let him read on his own; whoever does not read, let him be a companion to his friends, which will encourage him to learn to read.

Many aspects of human nature have changed, and one cannot take pedagogical advice from the Gemara alone, any more than one can decide halacha from the Gemara alone. Yet important concepts can be derived from this teaching, even if we might apply them differently in the 21^st century.

Not coincidentally, the subject matter of this passage refers to both the gifted student and the more challenged student simultaneously. The first part of the passage functions as a warning to parents and educators that even a precocious youngster should not be made to learn before he is emotionally capable of sustaining the effort and concentration necessary. Don’t burn him out, despite his intellectual ability. The second part of the passage is intriguing and somewhat ambiguous. It suggests that if a child is unable to grasp the material, do not come down hard on him, but do not dismiss him either. Instead let him stay so that he can “be a companion to his friends.”

There are various interpretations of this idea. Rashi understands this to mean that even if he does not fully understand the material, over time, and by osmosis, he will absorb much of what he can. Maharsha interprets this differently. He says the point of being a companion to his friends is so he won’t feel bad being left out of the fun. That is, if the weaker student gets to “hang out in the gym,” it makes it harder for the stronger students to stay focused, given their relative immaturity.

Sod Yesharim (Seventh Night of Pesach 15:1) offers by far the most provocative explanation. He says the contrast is necessary in order to bring out the best in the students. He explains that in the spiritual nature of the world, there is always the presence of a countervailing force. This is an important truism. A world full of light might as well be completely dark, as our vision is only enabled via the contrast. So, too, in matters of spirituality. I believe it is for this reason that the blessings of Krias Shema, which are a precursor to Torah, begin with praising G-d for “forming light and creating darkness.” Sod Yesharim even suggests that Sodom was the “Anti-Avraham”; he stood for love, humility, and kindness and they stood for greed and cruelty. It is not a coincidence that Sodom was destroyed subsequent to Avraham fulfilling the covenant and bris milah. Once Avraham achieved completion in this aspect of his development, Sodom was no longer needed.

My father-in-law, Rav Michoel Miller, z”l, used to say that Dasan and Aviram get to survive after so many of their misdeeds – they snitch on Moshe, and they mock him and are insubordinate by trying to show that the Manna can be collected on Shabbos. Yet they come through unscathed. In the various stories of the wilderness, every misdeed by every other character seems to meet with swift punishment and decimation. How come these guys escaped, at least until the Korach rebellion? Rav Miller surmised that Dasan and Aviram were there to counterbalance Moshe’s leadership, a check and balance. (Perhaps their intentions were at least partially good.)

Here too, the young school children need a contrast in order to see and appreciate their own abilities. Sod Yesharim does not say this, but I will add that this contrast may also help the weaker students as well, by prodding them to try harder to fulfill their potential. As we shall see in Bava Basra daf 22a: “The jealousy of scholars promotes wisdom.”

Highly Sensitive Persons

Bava Basra 23

Our Gemara on amud aleph tells us about Rav Yosef, one of the most respected sages of the Talmud, who describes himself as more sensitive than typical. This has halachic implications for what types of nuisances and pollution his neighbors must remove. In a different Gemara (Succah 29a), Rav Yosef’s sensitivity also has implications on when he is exempted from the mitzvah of Succah, based on his lower threshold of tolerance for discomfort than others. There are a few other Amoraim who also describe themselves as unusually sensitive, once again with actual halachic consequences, such as Rav Nachman and Rav Chisda (Yoma 30a).

I find this psychologically fascinating. There is a complete absence of cynicism such as “It’s all in your head” or “get over it” – instead there is total acceptance of the subjective internal state and feelings. I think it is sadly often the stance we modern westernized people take to subjective phenomena that cannot be scientifically measured or understood. We say, “It’s not real – buckle down and stop making excuses.” In ancient times, despite the generally harsher conditions, there seemed to be far greater respect for natural differences. I believe industrialization has had a negative impact on allowing for the natural tendencies of individuals. The pace of work required to fit into a model of production and labor for a larger company instead of a simpler economy made people adapt and betray their own individual needs and pace of life.

Even in Talmudic times, we find the bustling metropolis of Mechoza treated people differently and with less respect. (See Gittin 6a: “The people of Mechoza are constantly in motion.” Literally, Mechoza translates in Aramaic as “the City.” In Mechoza there was an indulged wealthy class who didn’t work (Pesachim 50b), and a worker class who were accustomed to unusually long hours of labor (Bava Metzia 76a). In addition, Mechoza was more regimented with regular stores never being open at night (Bava Basra 29b), while other towns operated on a more casual schedule. Imagine some small, backwoods town where the general store owner is also the sheriff and the pharmacist. He opens his store when someone knocks on the door.

Regardless, the respect for individual variances and personal sensitivities displayed by the Sages is a refreshing and important reminder for parents and educators. To this point, Dr. Elaine Aron began researching the traits related to sensitivity in 1991. She coined the label HSP, for Highly Sensitive Persons, and authored a number of research publications and self-help books. There are a number of co-occurring traits that cluster in regard to persons with HSP, such as processing and perceiving on a deep level, but also then being easily overwhelmed by too much information or emotions. HSP is not an excuse for poor behavior, as all of us are responsible to manage the interplay of our emotions and our behavior. However, it is important to respect that what is easy for one person might be challenging to another.